Monday, May 17, 2010

My life in boxes

As I told you the other day, I'm moving. (Again.)

But what I didn't tell you is where I'm moving to.

Cue Bon Jovi: Who says you can't go home...

Yep, that's right. Unfortunately and fortunately, I'm moving back home. To my parents' house.

I say unfortunately because moving home seems like a step backwards. I'm 25 years old and I'm going to be living with my parents. Now, I know that 20-somethings moving back in with their 'rents is a growing trend in today's economy and nothing I should feel ashamed about, but I have to admit, I do feel a little embarrassed.

In many ways, I have been "on my own" since I went off to college freshman year. Yes, I did come home each summer and after graduation I stayed at my parents' house for a few months. But as soon as I was able, I moved out to live in an apartment with my best friend, Marielle (and really, I wasn't financially ready to do it and it was probably not the best decision but I did it anyway).

After living with Marielle and two dudes for a year, I moved into an apartment with the boy. And then we moved into another apartment, where we are now. In the three years since I graduated I have moved four times (counting moving home from college) and now I'm moving again! And oh man, do I hate moving. (It just reminds me how much stuff I have and how big of a pack rat I am!)

But besides from not wanting to move home because of the whole "independence" thing, I am also worried because I honestly think that my parents and I get along a lot better since I moved out. (Mom, don't take that the wrong way!) I think we'll be fine because I have grown up; I'm not a teenager anymore, after all. But these past few years, I could go over to my parents house when I wanted to, call when I wanted to talk... I'm sure those of you who live on your own understand. So I say all this to say that while moving home is not the end of the world, it will take a bit of adjustment. (And, a lot of cleaning! Almost done with that though, almost done.)

On the other hand, I say it is fortunate for me to be moving home because, well, let's face it, it will save me a lot of money. Luckily, my parents haven't asked me to pay rent while living at home. And luckily, I have parents who actually want to take me back in! I do realize that isn't the case for some people, so I am grateful that my parents would let me come home, for free, no problem. No hesitation. They are happy to have me back. (And I'm triply lucky that home is just 15 minutes across town.)

And that is the main reason I am moving back home: to save money. I have found myself living paycheck to paycheck for quite some time (High rents in Simi + low income + no chance of a raise + no time to get a second job {and I did apply for one recently only to come to my senses} = financial instability) and things only got worse when the boy lost his job. I found myself having to loan him money that I didn't really have. Moving home will give me a chance to actually save some dough. (Remember my No. 1 New Year's resolution?) Maybe I'll even open a savings account!

So while there are some drawbacks to going home, there are definite benefits, too.

Our lease is up Friday and I spent much of the weekend packing up my life in boxes, so to speak. There's still more to do but by Saturday I will officially be a "boomerang kid."

Images via we heart it, here and here.


Helen said...

I'm really proud of you for making this step - I know it's hard, but it's the right thing. I totally understand about the independence factor, but this is a very mature decision that took guts! Go you!

Erin said...

It's a brave move you're making Carissa, and I bet it will help you get back up on your feet and moving in the direction that you want to go! What does this mean for you and the boy? Is he going back to his parents'?

Good luck with the move. I'll be thinking of you!

Diana Mieczan said...

I comment you for that...It’s a hard decision to make and it’s the right one for sure! I hope it will be an easy transition :)
Kisses and have a lovely Monday :)

linda said...

It's so funny to me when I read this post and thought to myself that it was completely parallel to what I went through last year.

I was 23 when I moved out with a friend, hoping that it would be permanent, but the economy tanked and I had to make a tough choice like you to move back home with the parents after just 1 year. It does suck to sorta lose that bit of freedom to do whatever you want, whenever you want, however you want with out someone breathing down your neck, but it is also great in that it does save money.

It's a smart choice you're doing and I wish you all the best with this new (old) change. =)

Ashley Yazzie said...


I get it. It's tough swallowing the pride and moving back home. That's tough stuff. But, make yourself a time line. I Carissa will be out by....Then try to pay a small "rent" each month to your mom. By the time you leave you will have that money saved. You can use it for a future cushion, or for first/last months rent and deposit for your future place.

Chin up! It's only in the United States that we have unrealistic expectations of having everything achieved by a young age. You're doing great. Count all the great achievements you've accomplished so far. This is just a character building moment.



Shoshanah said...

They definitely are benefits to moving back home. Financially being the main reason. I could see it being a little awkward at first, trying to figure out the rules. Like if you're staying out all night do you call just so they don't worry? But I'm sure you'll get it figured out. And at some point you'll be off on your own again. Good luck packing and moving and living with your parents!

alli/hooray said...

Good luck with the move! My best friend is the same age + doing the same thing in order to save money. It's a great way to get a start again (+ wonderful to have parents who are understanding!).

Dionne said...

I think you're stronger than you realize. Swallowing your pride to do what's best for your future takes a lot of guts. I think you made a wise decision. And it's great that your parents want you home - I sure wish I lived closer to mine - even living with them would be lovely!

Carissa said...

thanks for all the sweet, encouraging comments you guys!

it's taken a bit of time to come to this decision and I definitely fought it for awhile, and though it is one of my only viable options at the moment, I also know that it is the right thing to do for me right now. and it won't be that bad :)

thanks again for being so supportive! you're the best!

Ashley said...

Sounds like you're making the smart decision, even if it isn't the easiest. Good luck at home!

Heather Taylor said...

Awww, I bet they're gonna be happy to have you back! I'm glad that they live so close too, that's a BIG help. I would probably move home if my parents lived that near to me only they kinda live 2000 miles away so yeah...nope.

Phoenix said...

Moving home is much, much, MUCH better than staying proud and racking up credit card debt.

This is only temporary, and it does not reflect on you, hon. We're all rooting for you!

Amber (Girl with the red hair) said...

Hi lady - just catching up and I think you're making the right choice! It's NOT a step backwards because once you start to see your account balance grow, you'll see it's really a step forward! Is the boy moving in to your parents with you?

Good luck with the move, and good for you for checking your pride and doing what's right! XO